Re: Husband is a pack rat

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: Aloha Nalani..... : : Hmmmm, seems like you have your hands full :) : Nalani, my first question is: Do you have the appropriate organizing tools around to assist your hubby in getting organized? My experience is that most things pile up in an environment due to lack of having the appropriate supplies/tools that *encourage* organization. : : For example: is there a magazine rack in the living room so that hubby can place his reading material IN it ...instead of on the flat surfaces??? These are easily purchased in many department stores. If he has a "reading chair" or favorite reading place ...put the magazine organizer right next to it. As subscriptions come in...implement a "one in...one out" method to help keep the mounds of reading material under control. If they are "keepers" make sure he has a bookcase or shelf to store the material when he is done with it. the magazine organizer is used for *current* material. While the shelf or bookcase is used for the "keepers." : As far as the nite stand is concerned, there are also numerous types of "containers" for this purpose too. Hold Everything is a wealth of organizing resources to help you out here. : Now the clincher would be to give him a certain amount of space that is absolutely *his* Once he outgrows the space it's time for him to make selections on what to keep & what to toss. What you have shared can be an annoyance to the appeal of a room. I would like to suggest that you have a talk w/him & tell him that YOU are attempting to be more organized. YOU are looking for suggestions to assist in this area. Avoid making it about him. That will cause a "defensive response." Oftentimes a spouse (male or female) may not have a clue that their habits may be interferring with the maintenace of the home. : "Ask" him what YOU can do to assist. I know most of the time the opposite spouse wants to *fix* the other. One can land in frustrating conversations, & stalemates. In my experience, it's the *way* we communicate to enroll the other in helping us out ...not always what we say :) : Nalani, I'd be curious to know *what* items are stored on the table near the bed? Also, does the table have a drawer??? See if you can come to an agreement that he can keep *whatever* he chooses ...it's just that it needs to ALL fit in a specific space. Once the space is filled & more stuff moves in ...well it's obviously time to make decisions. : See if you can come up w/an analogy that may create a *picture* for your hubby. Something he can REALLY relate too! : Also, be aware of the fact that most people who hold onto *everything* got burnt so to speak at some point in life....they probably threw something out once & regretted it ...hence they start holding onto everything for fear of throwing out the *wrong* thing. : BTW: my hubby holds onto a great deal more than I do. Yet, he is in agreement that his stuff belongs in his space ...when that space fills up HE is the one w/the dilemma ...it doesn't mean he gets to expand into a "common area." About 2x a yr. he has to go thru his stuff & make decisions ...so far so good :) And yes, he DOES finally toss something out after several months when he feels sure it is no longer needed. What I had to learn to do was be quiet of what *I* thought was no longer needed -- even if it was something he chose to toss 6 mo. after the fact :) : It's important NOT to hound someone in the process. That is why the initial dialogue to come to an agreement is so important. Create a *picture* he can relate with, & keep me posted if you run into a standstill ...we'll see what you may want to change in "your approach." Just remember *appealing* to someone will get you MUCH farther than hounding them :) : : Much Aloha, : Julie Signore - CEO : 1,2,3 SORT IT Organizing Solutions -- Innovative Tools : NSA Member, NAPO Member : :

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